family

It takes a village to raise a child.

That used to be a powerful sentiment in our culture. It still is in a few places in the world, but not here. Unfortunately, I think it’s been demoted into some kind of past, pleasant ideal. We postmoderns are far too individualistic for such a concept. We do things our way and no one is going to impose their ideas on us! And the results are obvious and heartbreaking.

It’s always difficult to nail down hard statistics, but most polls report that the divorce rate in America is more than 50%. If you think that’s inflated, ask yourself this question: do I know any divorcees? How many? It’s sad. Connected to that fact, about a third of all children (under the age of 18) live with only one parent. They are desperately needing and missing the influence of either an ever-constant mother or father. Then there are the millions of kids that lack both. Perhaps they live with a grandparent, close relative or are being bounced around the foster care system. Certainly, some of these cases are legitimate due to a tragic death, etc. Most of them, however, are painfully unnecessary.

In the ancient nation of Israel, the focus was always on the next generation. The adults directed their energies toward teaching and passing along their faith in God. Why? Because they understood that their children were the hope and future of the entire nation! They did not have any kind of formal, educational degrees or youth ministry training. Yet everything they did was for the purpose of instilling the love and fear of God into their kids. And there were no church children’s pastors or youth leaders either. A child’s father and mother were his primary teachers, but every single adult felt the weight and responsibility to help raise the children. They were all expected and even required to minister to the children. We are missing that sense of family.

Even if we don’t have biological children of our own, we have a duty to spend time mentoring those who come behind and follow us. Some wonderful examples of this relationship in Scripture are Moses and Joshua, Eli and Samuel, Elijah and Elisha and, of course, Jesus and His twelve disciples. Most of the important lessons in life are not taught, but caught. We cannot learn them unless we have someone who will walk beside us, show us personally and help us learn through experience. We long for that environment of family.

And this responsibility is bigger than what we might normally designate as “family.” In reality it extends throughout our circles of influence. We can choose who we want to be in our family. What is adoption if not the choice to bring another precious life into one’s inner circle? In the Greek language, which the New Testament was written in, the key word was oikos, or household. Our household would certainly include blood relatives, but also close friends, neighbors and even coworkers. So many of our contemporary relationships are surface-level. We talk about the game last night or the upcoming American Idol season, but never discuss things of real worth like our marriages, feelings and inner struggles. We all crave that sense of family.

Now let’s not sugarcoat this. It’s not easy or quick. In fact, it’s quite the opposite. Raising a family is extraordinarily messy. And I don’t just mean this in a literal, physical sense. Raising a family is emotionally messy, mentally messy, socially messy and spiritually messy. No book, seminar or conference can properly instruct. No one can ever be fully prepared. We learn as we go, through on-the-job training. There will be lots of mistakes and times where we’re tempted to throw our hands in the air, but we press on. We’re committed to working through the mess no matter what. We need that dedication of family.

God created and blessed the family unit at the very beginning of our story (Genesis 2). It was one of the first things He did. That must mean it’s important. Holy Seed Community Church is fiercely committed to family. We’re going to strive to be the best spouses, parents and friends possible. We’re going to raise Godly children (Holy Seed) and watch them grow toward Jesus. And, thankfully, we can do it together. On our own, we would fail miserably. The wise man or woman knows that it takes a village to raise a child.